How about we discuss something a little less dire now, okay?
I started thinking this morning about something I said a while back in that long entry about my personal history with the Titanic story. Specifically, I opined that the late actor Richard Jordan made a better Dirk Pitt in the 1980 movie Raise the Titanic than Matthew McConnaughey did in his 2005 film, Sahara. Dirk Pitt, to refresh everyone’s memories, is the fictional hero of a long-running series of adventure novels by a guy named Clive Cussler. While I doubt even the hardest-core Cussler enthusiast would ever argue (at least not with a serious face) that the Pitt novels are anything resembling “good” literature, I’ve always found them to be reliably entertaining summertime/airport reads, in large part because the central character is so vividly drawn by the author. Readers of these books know Dirk Pitt.
Now, neither Jordan nor McConnaughey resembles Pitt as Cussler describes him: craggy features, thick black hair, and deep green eyes. In fact, the only actor that I can think of who remotely fits that description is Tom Selleck in his Magnum P.I. heyday. But no matter; oftentimes it’s more important for an actor in a film adaptation to convey a character’s spirit than to literally look the way the author visualized him. So, what do we know about Pitt’s spirit?
Well, he’s a romantic with a deep respect for history and its artifacts, as well as for the sea. He’s a defender of justice, the sort of hero who stumbles into situations in which people are being mistreated and he won’t rest until he’s corrected the problem. He has a kind heart that endears him to women, but he can be single-minded and absolutely ruthless when he needs to be. He’s frequently brash when the action is underway, but he’s also methodical when he’s trying to unravel a mystery or searching for a treasure. He’s a rough-and-tumble man’s man who enjoys a burrito with his pals, but given his background as the wealthy son of a U.S. senator (and occasional lover of another), he’s equally comfortable rubbing elbows with the upper crust and enjoying the finer things.
Little of this is depicted in the two movies, which are both pretty light on the background character details. But again, we’re looking for a sense of the character, if not the specifics. So, given all that, which one of these guys do you think looks more like like he has an explorer’s heart and a gourmand’s taste, who can gallantly offer his arm to a little old lady before cold-bloodedly shooting an assassin between the eyes? Is it this guy?

Or this one?

I suppose it’s all a matter of personal taste, but to me, McConnaughey’s Pitt looks more likely to scarf a bag of Cheetos and a six of Bud Light than sip a flute of Veuve Clicquot, and I just don’t buy him as a rugged sea-faring man with a passion for history. Maybe it was Jordan’s beard. Or the fact that he was my first exposure to the character. Or maybe it’s just that the only thing I’ve ever really liked McConnaughey in was Dazed and Confused, and I can’t see him as anything other than a laid-back goofball.
Not that any of this matters, of course. Neither film exactly set the world on fire, and as far as I know, there are no Pitt fanboys out there clamoring for another one. In addition, Cussler has made no secret of how badly he feels Hollywood mistreated him and his creation — he even sued the producers of Sahara, although I no longer remember exactly why — so he’s not likely going to be too willing to option out another of his books. Besides, it also seems to me that the books are not as popular as they once were. They’re still coming out, but Cussler himself has retired in all but name, and they’re now being written by his son, Dirk Cussler (yes, Dirk Pitt was named for Cussler’s own son). All of which means, it’s pretty unlikely there will ever be another Pitt movie starring… anybody. But the way I see it, Tom Clancy fans like to debate which actor best embodied their boy Jack Ryan, and of course the question of who is the definitive James Bond has been an evergreen movie-nerd topic for decades. So why not quibble over our favorite Dirk Pitt as well?
(Incidentally, my opinions on the other two subjects are Alec Baldwin in Red October, and Sean Connery as Bond, as good as the Daniel Craig reboots have so far been…)