Archives

Nov142005

Franklin? Who the Heck Is Franklin?

I loved the Peanuts comic strip when I was a kid. I had — still have, somewhere in the depths of the Bennion Archives — a dozen or so paperback compilations that I carried around in my back pocket all through my elementary-school years. I practically had those books memorized, I flipped through them so frequently. I identified with Charlie Brown’s insecurity and I thought the World War I flying ace was the coolest. But as I moved into middle school, I came to realize that I didn’t think the strip was very funny. It was gentle and wise, as its fans so often claim. It was also stodgy and old-fashioned, sometimes preachy, occasionally heartwarming or cute, but it was never funny. I can’t recall ever laughing out loud at a Peanuts strip the way I did over Bloom County or Calvin and Hobbes or even the early, pre-sell-out Garfield, and I honestly can’t remember the last time I actually read a Peanuts strip.

Still, I do have a soft spot for the characters of Charles Schulz — they were very important to me when I was very young and memories of them linger in my heart, like kindergarten friends you haven’t seen in decades — so I couldn’t resist taking the latest personality quiz that’s circulating through the blogosphere, the Which Peanuts Character Are You? test. Here is my result:

Franklin
You are Franklin!

Which Peanuts Character are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

I guess this is an accurate enough description of me. Funny thing, though: I don’t remember this character. Not even a little. I find that odd and more than a little disturbing, considering how obsessive I used to be about this strip. Who is this guy? And what does it say about me that my Schulzian personality match is so forgettable?

spacer
Nov132005

Disclaimer About What I’m Doing Here

A few days ago, when I wrote about that pirate attack on a cruise ship, I pooh-poohed the idea that the liner had used a futuristic weapon to drive off the bad guys. At the time I wrote my blog entry, I’d seen only one mention of this weapon among several news articles and, because of the early lack of coverage on this aspect of the story, I felt justified in my skepticism. You have to admit, it does sound pretty far-fetched; even the name used to describe it in that one article, “sonic blaster,” sounds like something out of the old Buck Rogers TV series. And even though blogs like Boing Boing and DefenseTech have documented the development of such weapons over the last couple of years, I guess I remained unconvinced because I was seeing it on the Internet instead of a more traditional news source, like Time magazine or something.

It turns out that such weapons apparently do exist and were used in that incident with the pirates, as a reader named Eric was all too eager to inform me. My exchange with him got pretty snippy, and it’s just as well that it was among the comments that did not survive the server upgrade. However, our argument has left me thinking about my responsibilities as a blogger, and what my readers — whether I know you personally or not — need to understand about what I’m writing in this space.

I am not a journalist. I don’t even play one on TV. I’m just a guy who has a small-time online presence and who chooses to share the things that catch my fancy. I do this for my own amusement and that of my friends and whatever strangers may enjoy my particular way of assembling words. I have neither the time nor the obligation to check every fact or chase down links within links. This means that Simple Tricks and Nonsense is best described as an opinion column — it’s what I think, nothing more, nothing less. I’m not trying to excuse my failure to determine the true facts in the pirate story; I am telling you that you shouldn’t necesarily expect the facts to be correct in everything I write here. I try to get it right, but sometimes I don’t. Sometimes I just skim-read the articles I link to, and I miss vital details. And sometimes I just plain screw up. It happens.

If you catch me on something, feel free to let me know I’m incorrect. But be polite about it. And keep in mind what it is I’m doing here.

spacer
Nov122005

Photo Gallery Still Intact

Earlier today (today meaning Friday, November 11 — I’m up way past my bedtime), Cranky Robert expressed a concern that the Simple Tricks photo gallery had vanished in the server upgrade. The gallery is actually still available at the same old URL, http://jasonbennion.com/photos/, or you can just click on this link, if you prefer to do things the modern, convenient way. Among the other changes going on around here, I am in the process of adding new pictures — indeed, whole new albums — to the gallery. I’ll let you know when they’re up and ready for the public.

I’ll be back in the morning with more blatheration…

spacer
Nov112005

Dealing with Comments and Spam

I’ve been exploring my new version of the blogging software this afternoon, specifically the functions related to comments and spam-filtering. I have many more options in this regard than I did before, including an authentication feature that would make my loyal readers prove that they were real human beings and not spam-dealing Cylons every time they tried to leave a comment. That seems a little draconian for my tastes, and frankly I’m not enough of a control freak to go for the “moderate comments” option that would require me to approve or disapprove every single comment before it gets published. (Some of you experienced that feature earlier today.) It’s not that I get that many comments; I just find it more spontaneous and enjoyable to have the comments publish immediately, for everyone to see. I figure there’s no reason to deprive my readers of comments they may find interesting just because I haven’t seen them yet, and it’s also easier for me to just look at the public site to see if anyone’s been around, rather than logging into my author’s interface and checking the list whenever I want to see if I’ve had visitors. So for now, I’m going to trust the spam filter to keep the junk out. If that doesn’t work, I’ll reconsider the authentication option. Just thought you might want to know…

spacer
Nov112005

New Digs

So, kids, you’ve probably noticed a few changes here at Simple Tricks and Nonsense. To explain, my Webmaster Jack has finally made good on that long-promised server upgrade, and this site is now living on a shiny new machine located on the 86th floor of a towering Manhattan skyscraper, surrounded by the very latest products of modern “super-science” and dedicated to the fight against evil in all its worldly forms…

Okay, so I’m embellishing a bit, but the site actually has been transferred to a new physical home, which should make things a bit more efficient on the back end. I don’t know if there will be a noticeable differences for my three loyal readers, either good or bad; if you have any problems, please leave a comment in this post or shoot me an e-mail at jason @ jasonbennion.com (remember to remove the spaces before and after the “@” symbol).

As for the change in the blog’s color scheme and layout, that’s because Jack also updated the Movable Type software that enables you fine folks to read all my blather, and it turns out that the new version doesn’t support my old stylesheet. I’m still trying to decide what to do about that; this new look is kind of nice, but I’ve always thought the old one provided a nice signature effect for the site. (I’ve seen very few other blogs that used my old color scheme, whereas this lighter, brighter one seems to be pretty common.) You’ll also notice that the customary list of links is missing. It should be back before too long in a new and improved form, as well as a couple of other ideas I’ve got brewing.

On the positive side, the new version of MT is supposed to be much better at handling comment spam, so we’ll have fewer embarassing incidents involving “male enhancement” products. And you can now search through past entries according to category, a luxury we didn’t have before. Guess I need to be more careful about how I file things from now on.

One final note: comments made in the last few days did not survive the transfer to the new server, so if you’re wondering what happened to your little piece of intellectual property, rest assured that I did not delete anybody’s thoughts on purpose. Just one of those things, and I apologize.

More a little later.

spacer
Nov072005

War Relics

From the Department of Random Coolness comes a nifty photo gallery of abandoned World War II-vintage sea-forts constructed in the Thames Estuary to defend Britain from Nazi attacks. There were three such forts in the Estuary, all consisting of off-shore platforms similar to modern-day oil rigs, bristling with guns and arrayed around a central control tower. One of these forts has collapsed in the 60 years since the end of the war, but the others are still standing out there in the water, slowly decaying memorials to a time most of us Internet users can’t even imagine. I especially like this photo, in which the towers look like Martian war machines straight out of H.G. Wells.

And there’s more, too: At one point in the ’60s, one of these abandoned forts was home to a pirate radio station. Photos from that time period are here, along with the sad news that the British government wants to demolish these fascinating old relics…

If you’ve got nothing else going on right now, check ’em out!

spacer
Nov072005

Yo Ho

I’d heard that there were still modern-day pirates operating in the Indian Ocean and near the coasts of certain, shall we say, restless nations, but this weekend’s report of a cruise ship falling under attack seems more like something out of a movie than anything that could really happen. Did you hear about this? Briefly, the luxury passenger ship Seabourn Spirit was off the coast of Somalia bound for Mombasa, Kenya, when it was beset by pirates in a pair of 25-foot inflatables. The pirates fired on the cruise ship with machine guns and an RPG, but the Spirit managed to outrun the shorter-range inflatables. How wild is that?

Even more wild is the science-fictiony claim made in one article I ran across this morning:

The liner used a sonic blaster to foil the pirates. Developed by American forces to deter small boats from attacking warships, the non-lethal weapon sends out high-powered air vibrations that blow assailants off their feet. The equipment, about the size of a satellite dish, is rigged to the side of the ship.

So far, the article I linked to above is the only mention I’ve found of this sonic weapon, so I’m inclined to think it’s nonsense, one of those paranoid fantasies that occasionally slips into the public consciousness, like black helicopters and “chem-trails.” That’s not to say sonic blasters are out of the realm of possibility — I have seen plausible-sounding stories about the development of such weapons. But you’d think that it would be bigger news if a radically new type of weapon actually had been deployed somewhere, and was used during such a spectacular incident. Unless of course you’re one of these Muldery types who is inclined to note that the mainstream US media has completely ignored the development of sonic blaster technology while the one article that mentions its use in the Seabourn Spirit case is from a British source. Hmmm… suddenly I feel the need to find my tinfoil hat…

In any event, I’m sure this incident was a pretty harrowing experience for the Spirit‘s passengers and crew, but, on the positive side, if you successfully survived a pirate attack, you’d have a helluva traveler’s tale to relate during your post-vacation slideshow…

spacer
Nov062005

Non-Political Meme

I suspect that the last couple of entries may have left a bitter aftertaste in the mouths of some of my loyal readers, so how about some nice refreshing memage as a palate cleanser? Here’s one courtesy of Jen, who always seems to find the current memes. It’s called The Meme of Two:

Continue Reading…

spacer
Nov052005

Scalzi on Presidential Incompetence, and Some Other Political Ranting

I imagine my previous entry probably ruffled a few feathers, so as long as everyone in Utah is pointing and hissing at me anyhow, I may as well go ahead and reference Scalzi’s recent post on President Bush’s plummeting national (if not local) approval rating. I find this section especially resonant:

What do I think about the Bush’s approval rating? Well, I think it’s exactly what he deserves. He’s a terrible president with an incompetent administration, and it’s gratifying to see the large majority of the American people coming around to this fact. Would that they would have come around to this conclusion a year ago, when the vote was on.

 

You’ll note, however, that I did not say that I was happy that Bush has such a God-awful rating. I’m not. Having a weak and deeply unpopular president makes us vulnerable as a nation, particularly when we are engaged in a war, and especially when engaged in a war that it is becoming increasingly clear the origins of which are best described as an administration misadventure. I don’t like Bush, and I wish he weren’t president; nevertheless he is my president, and my country is ill-served at home and abroad by his weaknesses, both real and perceived. Noting that this is a mess of his own making is cold comfort indeed. Bush may have made this bed, but we all have to lie in it.

 

One hopes that if the American people get anything out of the Bush second term, it’s to be reminded that the next time around, Republican or Democrat or something in between, they might want to try for competence. It’s not too much to hope for. Because at a 35% approval rating, we have a clear indication people recognize that incompetence isn’t working.

Continue Reading…

spacer
Nov042005

Why Do I Stay Here?

From time to time, well-meaning friends who have escaped the protective dome that seals off my home state from the rest of our sinful planet ask me why I stay in Utah. Their implied suggestion is that I, with my unorthodox (for Utah) interests and attitudes (not to mention my somewhat scruffy looks), might be happier if I lived in some place a bit more… cosmopolitan. I don’t deny that they could be right. After all, I am an unmarried, childless, socially liberal, anti-authoritarian agnostic who enjoys the occasional distilled beverage and generally doesn’t care what people do (or don’t do) with their genitalia. My out-of-state friends are not misguided to wonder what could possibly keep me living in a place that is notoriously conservative, religious, provincial, family-oriented, and hostile to dissenters — in short, about as opposite from everything that defines my life as you can get. Nevertheless, my response to their concern is usually just a shrug and the somewhat lame proclamation that, “this is home.”

Continue Reading…

spacer