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Which Superhero Am I?

Hi, kids! Long time, no blog. Things have been hectic since the changeover to the new server. I am working on a couple of entries that I’ll hopefully be able to finish and post later today, but in the meantime, and in honor of tonight’s opening of Superman Returns, here are my results for the latest Internet quiz, “Which Superhero am I?”
Your results:

You are Spider-Man

You are intelligent, witty, a bit geeky and have great power and responsibility.
Spider-Man
75%
Green Lantern
75%
Hulk
65%
Iron Man
65%
Catwoman
60%
Supergirl
55%
Robin
52%
The Flash
50%
Wonder Woman
45%
Superman
40%
Batman
30%

Click here to take the “Which Superhero am I?” quiz…

I don’t know about the “great power and responsibility” bit — unless you count my ability to hold up production on advertising materials because of a misplaced comma — but I’ll buy the rest of it. I may not be able to climb walls and swing through the concrete canyons of Manhattan, but I do share Peter Parker’s affection for redheads. Still, I wonder why the quiz didn’t assign me Green Lantern, given that the score is the same? I don’t understand how these things work, I guess…

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Live and Direct… Sort Of

My three loyal readers (and you know who you are) may have noticed that Simple Tricks went unexpectedly missing yesterday. That’s because my friend and webmaster Jack was switching the site over to a new server from the broken-down old ENIAC we’ve been using. He assures me the new hardware will be faster and more efficient on the back-end; I don’t know if you folks out there in InternetLand will notice any difference, but you may see some improvements in load-up times or something.

So far, it appears that the transfer of the blog has been carried off without a hitch. Everything that was here before is here now. I think. If anyone notices any problems I haven’t seen, please let me know. The photo gallery, on the other hand, is going to be in flux for a couple of days while Jack upgrades the gallery software and I perform some housekeeping I’ve been meaning to do for a while. I’ll let you all know when that’s back, too…

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Quickies

Just a few of the interesting links I’ve run across today:

  • Remember that gag video about how the iPod package would look like if it was designed by Microsoft? It seems that was created by Microsoft itself as an in-house presentation about the problems of branding and packaging. Details here.
  • Courtesy of Phil Plait’s Bad Astronomy Blog, a pretty nifty animated gif of Earth rising into the Martian sky. Naturally, this was assembled using photos taken by those amazing little Mars rovers. As Phil points out, “Everyone you know is in that picture, on that tiny mote of light.” I find this humbling, and really, really cool.
  • And finally, something that should come in most useful for you “workin’ for the weekend” types, a German blog that demonstrates through photographs 1,000 methods for opening a bottle of beer. Prost!

Have a good night, folks…

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Scene from the Urban Landscape

Walking along Salt Lake’s Main Street here in the heart of downtown, you pass a planter box about every twenty or thirty feet. These things are huge, roughly the size of the bed on a half-ton pickup truck; they each contain a mature tree and usually a nice arrangement of petunias or some other colorful but relatively low-maintenance flower. They’re also capped around their perimeters with a marble ledge about a foot wide, and those ledges are at just about the perfect height for the average-height person to rest their hindquarters. So, let’s review: you’ve got a nice, comfortable, flat surface under a shady tree in the middle of an urban area. What does that get you? That’s right, a perfect invitation for those members of society who are, shall we say, less obligated to be anyplace during the day to park their behinds and watch the world go by. My lunchtime constitutional is not complete unless I get hit up for pocket change at least three times between my office and the next block up. On the days when I’m feeling generous, I pass out whatever coins and small bills I may have; other days, it annoys the hell out of me to be seeing the same old grubby hands attached to the same old pleading faces. And then there are other days…

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Superhero for a Day

Although tear-jerking, heart-warming tales of sick little kids are all over the Internet and I suspect at least half of them are probably bull, this one raised a genuine lump in this old curmudgeon’s throat: last Friday, the Idaho chapter of the Make-a-Wish Foundation organized virtually the entire city of Boise to fulfill a young cancer victim’s desire to become a superhero. Yes, a superhero, complete with a costume, a super-villain to pursue, and super-sidekicks to help out. The kid girl even got a phone call from Adam West, which is kind of silly when you think about it; a six-year-old wouldn’t remember Michael Keaton’s Batman — or even Val Kilmer‘s or George Clooney‘s — let alone West‘s. (West was no doubt cheaper than the other fellows.) Still, what a great gesture of community compassion. And just about the time I was ready to give up on the whole human species as a bunch of selfish jerks…

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Welcome to the Game Grid

With rare exceptions, I’m not a big fan of modern architecture (or perhaps “post-modern” is the more appropriate term). Neither is Lileks, who I’ve quoted on this subject before. He and I are light-years apart politically speaking, but I think we share the same philosophy when it comes to buildings:

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Remember, We Survived

I’ve believed for some time now that we Americans are turning ourselves into a nation of infantilized wussies. Seriously. We worry constantly about achieving “closure” for every little childhood trauma, we dress ourselves in soft ‘n’ cuddly fleece outfits that resemble nothing so much as overgrown jammies (all they need are the sewn-in feet), and we’re downright obsessed with safety. Cops pulling you over for not wearing your seatbelt, those obnoxious seals that have to be removed from all of our food and medicine containers, warnings on the sides of our coffee cups that the contents may be hot (duh!)… it’s enough to make me want to run out and do something positively reckless, like run with the bulls in Pamplona or wave freshly baked cupcakes at the women coming out of Gold’s Gym.

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Interview with Dennis Muren

If you’re at all interested in special effects in the movies — the techniques that enable the Millenium Falcon to fly and Jurassic Park‘s T. Rex to run — then you probably know who Dennis Muren is. If you don’t, please allow me to introduce you: he was one of the founding members of Industrial Light & Magic, the company that grew out of the team George Lucas assembled to do the effects (FX) work on the original Star Wars, and he’s since gone to help pioneer just about every major advancement in the field over the last three decades. He’s worked on an astounding string of groundbreaking, FX-heavy movies. He’s the first visual effects artist to be honored with a star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame. And he also made a cameo appearance in Raiders of the Lost Ark — he’s the Nazi agent who glances out from behind the Life magazine when Indy boards the China Clipper to begin his quest for the Ark.

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Sci-Fi Armor Becoming Real

From the “We’re living in the Future!” department comes news of a wild new “liquid armor” that could supplement or even replace the conventional Kevlar vests used by soldiers, law-enforcement officers, and anti-government wackos. At the very least, it could protect the unarmored limbs that kids are currently losing in Iraq:

“We can make thin layers of material for use on the arms and legs that remain flexible under normal motion, but become rigid and absorb energy when impacted by a ballistic threat or a knife,” [researcher Norman] Wagner says.

Cool, cool stuff. Of course, science-fiction writers came up with this idea a long time ago, so this is really only a case of life imitating art… which brings me back to my usual question: where is my Skywalker-style speeder bike, anyhow?

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